There is an epidemic that is harming young men all over the Western world. For the first time in history, an entire generation of men prefers to play video games, live with their parents, and waste time on the internet. Of course, this makes them unable to create a relationship with a beautiful woman, build a career, and make a real life for themselves. While many propose that men simply need to “grow up,” the issue is much more complex than this. While there are plenty of men who have chosen to live as boys in the United States, numerous men have taken the plunge of moving abroad and becoming the best versions of themselves by accepting responsibility for their own lives.
Today, we’re going to talk about how living abroad forces young boys to lift themselves up, and truly become the men they are destined to be.
Table of Contents
The State of Modern Men: Never Accepting Responsibility
Let’s take a look at the life of a modern “man.”
He has one of two types of bodies: skinny and frail, or chubby and soft.
His body an external representation of what is going on inside of his mind. His physicality shows that he has been unable to adequately learn how to exercise and to feed himself healthy, nutritious food.
Based on his appearance, it is clear that he has poor impulse control because nobody would actually choose to look like him.
Ease is something that he craves in life. As a result, he’s gone along with what his parents, teachers, school administrators have told him to do with his life. This means going to college, getting a “real job,” and proceeding to work at a place he is supremely uninspired by.
He hates it.
Somewhere in his heart, he knew all along that he isn’t enjoying this, but accepted defeat a long time ago. He’s convinced himself that he has to work 40 hours a week to earn $50,000 a year before the government takes their cut.
After taxes, he actually makes $35,000. Adjusted for inflation, his father made far more than he does working in a steel mill in the 1970’s.
So much for “progress.”
Realistically, he’s barely hanging on. He and his buddies at the office frequently joke about the amount of time they spend “working.” Hard work, as it turns out, is basically a foreign concept to them.
They spend most of the day dicking around on the internet. He’s frequently late for everything. His mind, like his body, is disorganized and sloppy. He can hardly pay attention to anything he doesn’t like doing for more than 15 minutes.
It’s for this reason that he, a 27 year old man, still lives at home with his Mom and Dad.
After college, he decided he would “move back in” with his parents to “save a little money” since his student loans are now costing him $500 a month. What was supposed to be a few months has turned into well over a year, and now he sees no reason to ever leave. His Mom is happy to have him, and yet his father frequently complains about his constant presence at home.
“Don’t you want to bring girls to your own place? I couldn’t wait to move out of my Dad’s house when I was your age,” his Dad often says over dinner.
Speaking of girls, let’s just say his love life isn’t so great.
The Pitiful Love Lives of Modern Men in America
This “man” had sex a few times in college, but only with a few particularly slutty girls. Much in contrast to what he was told college would be like, it wasn’t exactly as frequent as he’d hoped.
Now that he’s left university, he’s hardly ever getting laid. Even though he and his four friends frequently spend their weekends in the local bars, he’s largely become celibate. To solve this, he watches internet pornography, something he has done since the age of 13.
He is ashamed of the types of videos he watches online. He’s had a few close calls when he let someone else use his laptop. He actually has nightmares about it sometimes.
In short, the modern “man” lives a broke, sexless existence with no genuine prospects for his future. He’s stuck in a dead-end job that barely pays him enough to pay back his student loans. He is the epitome of “going nowhere fast” and is making remarkably little progress in his life when compared to his ancestors.
In short, he’s a total schlub and nobody wants to be him.
Somewhere, deep inside of himself, he knows that something is very, very wrong with his life.
He has a deep, gnawing feeling in his stomach before he goes to sleep each night. Sometimes, he even cries, but he does not know why.
It’s for this reason that he has been on and off anti-depressants, ADD medication, and various other psychiatric drugs since the age of 13. Coincidentally, this is the first year he began his internet porn habit.
Deep down inside, he is ashamed of himself. He hates his frail body, his weak mind, his empty wallet, and his miserable existence.
He stalks the Instagram accounts of popular guys in his community, celebrities, and various other “success porn” accounts like clockwork.
This is partly out of jealously, and part admiration.
“Why can’t I have that…” he thinks to himself.
Little does he know, he could have it all, if he did but one thing…
Accepting Responsibility…What’s That?
I wish I could say the above example is a rare exception, but instead, he’s actually become the norm.
The process of this man “unfucking” his life looks intense.
Every traditionally male institution that was supposed to help guide him through life has been eradicated.
His father is emotionally unavailable and was just as much of a loser as he was, but in a time when it was easier for an average man to have a good life in the West.
His mother has dispensed nothing but pure and utter garbage advice to him. She’s told him to “just be himself” and to “be a nice guy” hundreds of times, to the point where he’s actually began to doubt her.
Realistically, it will take hundreds of hours of work to even begin enacting meaningful change to where this young man sees his life begin to improve even marginally.
You could say he has a million different problems, and you’d be absolutely right.
He’s not ambitious, he doesn’t work out, he’s lazy and disorganized, he has “ADD,” he needs to learn how to talk to women, he must quit porn, etc…
In reality, all of these things are true, and yet none of them are true.
Focusing on just one of them is missing the point.
In fact, is one trait that exemplifies the modern man more than any other.
Do you want to know what this trait is?
He is an expert at not accepting responsibility for his life.
A Stolen Future
I’m not going to lie, I once spent my life as a highly irresponsible individual, kind of like the one above.
While I was never quite as bad as him (I never had problems meeting girls), I lived much of my adult life as a man-child who was just scraping by.
I would entertain my childlike mind with delusions that someday I was gonna “hit it big” and that if I just kept “working” on my silly goals, I would get there.
The reality is I didn’t know the meaning of hard work. And neither do you.
I thought of myself as being better than the average lazy loser, but in reality, I was worse.
I was prideful and delusional. My sin, of course, was arrogance.
In the end, we were all in the same boat: a bunch of lost souls, trying to find our way in a world that’s locked us out and thrown away the key.
The problem of modern men not wanting to grow up and accept responsibility for life is not necessarily an indictment of everyone’s character. Instead, it’s a sign of the times.
Realistically, we have to keep in mind that there are greater issues at work here.
The Rewards Are Great
Historically, a man was always taught to “grow up” and accepts responsibility because he believed that he will be rewarded for doing so.
Why else would a young man leave the comfort of home and all he knows? Because there’s a clear prize in sight, a light at the end of the tunnel.
Historically, young men would undergo a “right of passage” in which they would be forced to overcome a difficult obstacle in order to enter adulthood.
If he emerged successfully, he was permitted to live life on his own terms, take on a wife (or two), and begin to make his mark on the world.
In the United States, however, those rewards have all but vanished.
America was once the greatest country on earth, and called the “land of opportunity.” That deal we were all promised growing up, however, has become a lot less sweet in the past 30 years.
In reality, nobody with a brain would want to date an overweight, sassy American woman. Working 40 hours a week at a job you hate, for a wage that hardly pays you enough to get by doesn’t exactly sound so great, either.
It is still entirely possible to work hard, save money, and do extremely well in the United States, but it is becoming harder and harder for the average, everyday man to follow this path.
Furthermore, just because you can doesn’t mean you should.
Accepting Responsibility Means Acknowledging the Truth About the United States
Sure, if you’re willing to work 55 hours a week at a financial firm, spend all of your disposable income living in a major metropolitan area, let your student loans grow out of control, watch your health decline, spiritually die, and finally kick the bucket at 55, be my guest.
Seriously. Go ahead and do it.
Close this webpage, walk away from your computer, and go back to your meaningless life.
In reality, most men don’t really want to do this. I could sit here all day and talk about how important it is to work hard no matter the circumstances. and while some of you would “get it,” it would be lost on the majority of men.
Why get married, when most marriages are statically proven to end in divorce, where 40% of men end up paying alimony to their ex-wives, even after she marries the next schlub?
Why get a job, when wages have stagnated for over 40 years? It’s not like you will be able to buy a house if you’re working most jobs. You’ll never get a pension, social security, and realistically have less job security than ever before? Your cost of living will eat up your income faster than you can say “paycheck!”
Why move out of your Mom’s house? It will just eat up more of your already low wage. It’s not like most guys are having sex anyways. After all, what girl wants to date a the average American soyboy?
Plus, it’s not like most of the girls the average man has access to are that hot anyways. And, don’t even get him started on all the “players” who treat girls like total jerks, but for some reason, they women flock to men like this.
At the end of the day: men need a reason to work hard.
They need to feel as if what they are doing matters.
What a man truly craves is meaning.
Meaning has been systematically eradicated from our lives.
Video games, internet pornography, and cheap thrills are all a replacement for that which we really crave.
Of course, you’re probably asking yourself…how do we reacquire meaning in our lives?
That, my friends, is through responsibility.
You Accept Responsibility For Your Life?
Perhaps you connect with some of the above points.
Or maybe, just maybe, this description fits you to a T.
In either case, accepting responsibility for your life is the catalyst for all positive change to take place.
Accepting responsibility is the trait that is going to encourage you to get your ass in the gym.
Accepting responsibility means making sure you have income so that you can save your money.
Accepting responsibility is what’s going to cause you to read books about self improvement, dress better, and begin dating beautiful women.
Listen, I’m going to do what nobody else has probably ever done for you…
I’m going to offer you a rare bit of sympathy here.
It’s fucking hard out there.
It can seem like everything is rigged against you, and you’re not wrong.
From 12 years of mandatory public schooling that’s designed to crush any creativity and free thinking out of you, to crippling student loan debt that’s bankrupting your future, to being born with poor genetics that make you an easy target for people who want to push you around…I get it.
I created this blog for people like you, and I’ve got news for you.
There is hope.
It’s Different Abroad
If there’s one lesson I’ve learned in life, it is the following: you are a product of your environment.
Almost everything there is set up to make you an obedient, tax-paying slave who is forced to sit by while everything is taken from him.
I’ve got news for you: lots of places are not like this.
Not by a long shot. Unlike in the West, most men in Eastern Europe would riot if they were faced with the conditions of the average American man.
The United States was once the land of opportunity. Unfortunately it, and most other Westernized countries, has become an environment in which the modern man is completely disempowered, and neutered of his true potential.
This leads us to the logical question of what to do next? For this, I’ll reference an age old proverb.
A wise man once said that “A journey of 1,000 miles begins with a single step,” and I’m here to advise you on what that first step can be.
Go abroad.
You Can Change, Start Accepting Responsibility For Your Life!
When a young man goes abroad to a place like Eastern Europe, a variety of things will often begin to happen to him.
He is absolutely floored by the number of beautiful girls he sees on a daily basis. It’s like living inside of a fashion magazine. Even the “hottest girls” in his home country hardly ever dress up so nicely and take such good care of themselves.
Here? It’s like he’s entered Shangri-La.
He’s immediately inspired to hit the gym, every single day, and work on his body. After some reading online, he finds a solid program that works for him and goes all in on it. He needs to look his best to try to land some of these hotties.
His diet improves. Unlike in the West, where all food is GMO, processed garbage, food in Eastern Europe is natural and can turn a boy into an ox.
Within a few months, he starts to get results.
What started off as freelancing odd jobs on the internet have turned into some real money. Even though he’s spent most of his adult life slacking off at work, he now knows that if he wants to make any money, he has to get serious about work.
To his surprise, he can pick up new skills relatively quickly. He realizes he can become a coder, a copywriter, and any job that can be done online. He just has to work at it.
And he does.
Accepting Responsibility Will Change Your Life
For the first time in his life, he is making enough money to actually begin saving some of it. After a few months he starts to think to himself: “Wow, if I save for a few more years…I could actually purchase an apartment!” In the meantime, he’s renting a nice place in the center of the city, the first apartment he’s ever lived in by himself.
In fact, it’s nicer than the home he grew up in. Imagine that.
Because he’s mostly working freelance online, he has a good bit of free time on his hands, and is free to brainstorm new ideas. He hasn’t the slightest clue about business, but he realizes that if he applies himself, it’s entirely possible for him to start profitable ventures online.
He knows that if he wants to keep his money coming in, he has to work hard. There’s no safety net here. He develops a newfound appreciation for work.
These changes set off a chain reaction of improvements in his life. Within the next year, his increased income and new motivation to meet girls leads him to discover how to approach women he does not know and dress better.
His bullshit friends are gone, and instead, he spends much of his free time Googling “male self improvement.” Just like in the video games he used to play, he’s “leveling up,” but in real life.
His parents come to visit him, one year later, and they can’t believe the person they’re looking at.
Their previously sloppy son who lived in their basement is doing better than his father was at his age. His muscles are toned, he has a nice haircut, and his fashion is impeccable. He even has a local girlfriend.
If this is what he could do in one year, the amount of growth that could take place in 5 years is unfathomable. The possibilities are endless.
You could say that our zero-to-hero did a million little things in the past year. He acquired countless skills, made tens of thousands of dollars online, got himself in the gym, and even learned how to talk to women.
But in reality, while he did plenty of little things…he actually did one big thing that started it all.
He took responsibility for his life.
He’s now on track to saving more money than anybody else his age. While everyone who ever picked on him rots away in an office from Monday to Friday, our hero now spends his days working in coffee shops, waking up whenever he pleases, and answering to nobody.
Who knows. If he keeps at it, and starts aggressively investing in index funds, he could be a millionaire in a decade.
This type of growth is just not possible in the United States anymore, especially if you want to do it on your own terms.
In the end, we can’t help but wonder what has driven men to fail en masse in today’s world?
What Drives Men To Fail?
Can you really blame American men for not wanting to take responsibility for their lives?
The situation there for many people is nothing short of hopeless. As the West continues to become less and less of an attractive place to live, men are gradually giving up on the roles they once played.
There’s almost no motivation for men to take responsibility while living in America. Everything has been stolen from him. He has been beaten down, wrung out, and left out to dry by society.
I hate to tell you, but your future has been stolen from you by a group of people who explicitly want to destroy masculinity. Without sounding too conspiratorial I’ll ask you to do but one thing…
Think about it. If you destroy the men of a country, what else is there? Men have been the backbone of human civilization since the dawn of time.
It’s Time To Make A Move
Alright, the easy part is over.
No more complaining. It’s time to take action.
It is your responsibility as a man to address these issues, and if necessary, remove yourself from the environment that is holding you down.
The truth of the matter is that there is a reason why most men don’t want to accept responsibility for their lives. It appears to be a fruitless endeavor where they stand to gain nothing, and lose everything. Hope has been removed from the life of the average American man.
His prospects on finding success in the job market are lower than ever, his chances of finding a faithful, attractive wife or even just having sex regularly are even lower. Traditionally male spaces, such as the Boy Scouts, barber shops, and athletic clubs are aggressively becoming “feminized.”
The very freedoms his parents took for granted, and those which brought his ancestors to the United States are quickly going away, and never coming back.
Nearly every person who lives in America is an immigrant who’s ancestors arrived on promises of hope and ambition for a better life. Now that these promises have vaporized, it’s time to adapt this same, pioneering mentality, and take action.
As such, you must do what any logical human being would do…
Accepting Responsibility: Leave the United States & Go Abroad!
Look, I’m not going to say it’s impossible to take responsibility for your life, and begin doing each of the things mentioned in this article while living in the West.
The problem is that most men are not going to. The motivations just don’t exist to entice the average man into action anymore in the USA. Remember: men are visual, results oriented creatures. In the United States, men are beaten over the head each and every day by a future that no longer belongs to them.
But, in a place like Ukraine? You have everything to gain.
In fact, the phenomenon I described above is not unique at all. In fact, it’s rather common for scruffy looking boys traveling around Europe to end up settling in Eastern Europe, establishing themselves, and becoming men in the process.
You have two choices. You can stay in whatever Westernized hellhole you have come from that has ultimately brought you seeking the truth, or you can take action and begin accepting responsibility for your life.
Your moment of sympathy is over, and now it’s time to take ACTION. No more excuses. From now on, you gave everything to gain, and almost nothing to lose.
“A man cannot unsee the truth. He cannot willingly return to darkness, or go blind once he has the gift of sight, any more than he can be unborn.”
You now know the truth.
What you do now is your decision, and yours alone.
Until next time,
-Expat Ukraine
PS: If you want to have a look at some of the beautiful girls that you can meet abroad, I highly suggest you check out this website.
Trackbacks/Pingbacks